You might remember a month ago I wrote a post on “Grown Children Moving Home – 3 Tips On How to Make It Work“. I thought it might be great to hear from my son (the boomerang kid) and his point of view.
I’m what you would call a “Boomerang Kid”. For those of you who are asking yourself, “What in the world is that?”, it’s a term used for a young adult who goes back to live with a parent after a period of independence. It’s something that has become more and more prominent in recent years and will probably continue to be a trend for years to come. After being one of these kids for about a month now, I feel I can shed some light from the other side.
The thing is, I always told myself and my parents I would never do it. At the ripe age of 21 I graduated college and thought I knew it all. I had a great degree and got a great job offer in a city far away. I had spread my wings and was soaring with absolutely no need to go back to the nest. I wanted to do things on my own and I really thought I had it all figured out. Well, as it turns out, at 21 years old you really don’t have any clue who you are or who you want to be. You might have an idea, and some may follow that path, but others may come to have a quarter-life crisis a few years down the line. That’s what happened to me at 24.
I was working as a software engineer with Garmin out in Kansas City with a steady career trajectory, good money, and great benefits. However, despite being a “techy” my whole life, I fell out of love with the corporate computer world pretty quickly. Sitting in front of a computer screen tucked away in a cubicle in an office building was not how I wanted to spend my youth. I wanted to go on adventures, see the world, and follow my true passions. This wasn’t really a startling revelation, as I had been talking about it more and more for almost two years. I just finally hit the breaking point and knew I needed to make a change.
I had a few options as far as my change went, but I didn’t even want to consider moving back home until I had a rather heartfelt conversation with my mom. I shared my feelings and thoughts. I told her I wanted to follow my dreams to be a writer and explore the world and would do whatever it took to get there. That I didn’t want to continue having my soul sucked away in a boring office job just so I could retire later in life. She told me that I should do it and that I could live with her while I figured things out. There was no hesitation on her side. That’s what I love about my mom. She is willing to do whatever it takes to help other people.
Some people would think I’m just a young millennial wanting instant gratification and not willing to put in the hard work. The fact of the matter is that isn’t how it has to be anymore. The world has changed and with it so have the people in it. We don’t have to be stuck doing something we don’t like. There are so many opportunities today and so many ways to go about them. I’m willing to put in the hard work, but I want to do it my way and I want to make it count.
Like I said, I didn’t really want to move back home. It felt like a failure to me because that is what I was always told by the older generations. If you’re a parent and your child becomes a “Boomerang Kid”, just know that it probably was not their first choice and they will need some time to figure things out. Everything has changed for them, but if they want it bad enough they will find a way to do what they want. I quit my job a little over a month ago and moved back to Birmingham to live with my mom and step-dad. I also brought my dog with me. Is it the most ideal situation? No. Is it permanent? No. Is it working at the present? Yes.
It is working right now, and I am okay with it at the moment because my mom and I had a discussion prior to me moving and we continue to have evolving conversations as to the current situation. We are all working with each other to make it work. I think it has its pros and cons on both sides, just as everything does in life. I am extremely lucky to have people that are willing to support my crazy decision and help me out along the way. Not everyone has that, and I promise it does make a major difference.
-Cole Adams
